This October began a challenging phase of my relationship with my sweetheart. He was offered and accepted a position in sunny Florida while I am in sometimes snowy (though currently not at the moment, thank goodness!!) South Dakota. According to MapQuest, the shortest route from here to there would take 33 hours and 17 minutes based on current traffic. Needless to say, we don’t get to see each other too often.
While I am perfectly capable, for the most part, of taking care of myself, my kids, my pets, my house and my yard, it is definitely nicer with someone here to help me out. We “get” each other like nobody else does. We share a lot of interests, although I guarantee I will NEVER be a fan of NASCAR and my tolerance of football extends to watching most of the commercials during the SuperBowl game and maybe a few minutes of the actual game 😉 I love my flowers and my garden and relish the moments when I see a new bud on a flower or vegetable plant and Todd enjoys the flowers, but not the process of planting, nurturing and caring for the gardens.
Life would be dull if we were identical, so I am grateful for our differences, but I relish our shared joys, like:
- movie dates (with the popcorn bucket….yum yum!),
- reading (I gravitate towards the spooky stories of Stephen King and Todd is more of a learning and leadership type of guy)
- concerts (we’ve seen quite a few already, from 3 Doors Down and Daughtry
to Loretta Lynn and Willie Nelson) (ok…..Willie Nelson I went to see begrudgingly, but for an old guy, he really did put on an excellent show!)
- music (goes hand in hand with concerts, right?!) I think my taste may be a bit more eclectic ranging from rock to country to showtunes, but we both enjoy listening to music while completing everyday chores and activities.
- cookies – I love making them and he loves eating them 😉
So, now that I’ve found my Mr. Wonderful and decided my future will be with him, what’s a girl to do when he’s over 2100 miles away?
I think we have to be creative. The other day I was lamenting the fact that the Nostalgia Movie Series that we’ve attended for the last 2 years will not be a possibility in 2014. I was moping around feeling sorry for myself when I came up with an awesome idea. We can still HAVE movie night, just not at the local theatre. I asked Todd and he was all for the idea of either renting or finding the same movies on Netflix and watching them together on Sunday evening (you know, “When Harry Met Sally” style! 😉 ). That got me thinking that I KNOW I’ve seen other great ideas for “long distance couples” so I decided to do some research.
In doing so I found Loving From a Distance, probably the BEST website about long distance relationships I’ve seen. Their website has a list of 103 things to do from a distance and the #1 thing on the list is to watch movies or tv shows simultaneously! Gosh, I guess great minds think alike!
Another great idea on their list is to get a book of questions for couples and answer that. It prevents conversations from being boring and getting in a rut and helps you to get to know the other person better. It’s a win-win opportunity for interesting conversation. We actually have a book like that, but haven’t used it in a while. I’ll have to brush the dust off of it and start using it again 😉
Really, though, I think that it IS possible to make a long distance relationship work. Todd already has two trips planned, one in December (in just a couple weeks…yay!) and one in January for his milestone 50th birthday!! I’m planning a trip to Florida next Easter with my two youngest kids and then God-willing, he will be making the long trek back to South Dakota not too long after his daughter graduates in May.
So, to answer my question above, I believe love long distance CAN work when both of the parties are committed to the relationship. I have faith that we will make it through this time and will appreciate each other even more because of it. I don’t want to wish my life away, but I will be thankful when he is back “home” again with me!