I think this quote from Robin Williams is so accurate. I truly used to think that being alone was the worst thing that could happen to me. I’m an introvert, so huge crowds drain me, but I do crave connections. I still would love to be able to have someone with me, someone to be able to say, Welcome Home, honey and a for-sure movie or dinner date. I still miss snuggling and look forward to the day when I have someone to kiss and to hold hands with.
Even now, I hear the voice in my head from the one who made me feel more alone when I was married than I have since. That voice tells me I don’t deserve someone. I’m not good enough. I have too many flaws. 😦
I am one that gives chance after chance and tries to always see the good in people. I am definitely guilty of trying to “fix” situations that are not fixable and to make excuses for inexcusable behavior.
One of the great exercises that my therapist gave me is to pretend that I am talking to a friend who is in the exact same situation. What advice would I give her? Hypothetically, If my friend were to call me and ask me if she should stay in contact with a person who cheated on her and broke her heart, I would say an emphatic NO, not just NO, but HELL NO! And, while it is hard to shut and lock that door, it is very necessary for peace of mind and mental health.
Despite what has happened, I still feel like there will be a special someone for me. When the time is right, he will “come out of nowhere and into my life” as Michael Bublé so eloquently sings. Any fans of the movie “Practical Magic” will remember when Sandra Bullock’s character, Sally, came up with a spell to call true love to her. She created someone so good he couldn’t possibly exist. While that didn’t ultimately end up the best for her, I don’t wish to call an “impossible” person to me. I was thinking of it and I did write down last night the attributes that my special someone will have. Here is my “perfect person”:
- Handsome (just enough for me…not drop dead gorgeous….but sometimes love makes the ordinary extraordinary)
- Kind
- Faithful
- Loving and affectionate
- Encourages me to be a better person, but accepts when I don’t quite make it
- Can (playfully) tease me
- Accepts my faith
- Gets along with my kids (as I will with his kids if he has them)
- Loves (or at least tolerates 😉 )my puppy Romeo
In the meantime, while I’m waiting for the time to be right, I’ll be single, happy and hopeful 🙂 I found a little sign that I have on my desk right now. It says, “I’m not single. I have a dog”. Works for me!
picturingpositive 
A fitting quote, as I am reading Robin right now. The worst thing any of us can do is settle. The right person is out there and you will find each other when neither of you is looking. Stay well and stay happy Beth. Allan
Thank you so much Allan! 😊 I am counting on that!. 😊❤😊. If you don’t mind sharing, what are you reading? Something by Robin or about Robin. I’m always eager to find a good story. I wish you a wonderful Wednesday and much happiness yourself. 😊
It is Robin’s biography by Dave Itzkoff. Mine is on Kobo. It is fairly comprehensive on Robin’s life. Stay well. A
Thank you Allan. You too! I will look that one up. I was always a fan of Robin’s. Such a talented soul.
I would move “Faithful” to the top of that list. Looks are fleeting but a loyal man is a gift from God! A wolf in sheep’s clothing will profess his love and fidelity for all to see but will go in for the kill when nobody is looking (or when he thinks nobody is looking). Protect your heart and be very cautious from such men. Honestly – having a companion who is willing to stay by your side (and in the same town) will be a much better start! God alone will cast the final judgment and there will be justice in the end. I think the bible is pretty clear on what God thinks of adulterers.
Trust me, my guard is up…..maybe even too much. It will be difficult to trust again. I wanted so much to believe that there was another explanation for what happened, but events of the day have unfortunately confirmed my very worst suspicions. I don’t understand why people can be so cruel. 😦 What I didn’t know certainly wasn’t hurting me. I would have preferred to remain in the dark. I knew something wasn’t right but kept waiting for a logical explanation that will never come. I’ve heard the same from many people but kept making excuses. Apparently I was the one who was deluded 😦
All I can do is keep on keeping on and trust that God has a plan and it was most likely divine intervention that got me out of that situation whether I wanted out or not at the time. Thanks for your comment. ❤
Great post. You are a special soul. God has someone in mind
Thank you so much, Laura ❤ I just hope to find someone honest and faithful. I don't think I can go through another one like that last. 😦
I love your bird painting with his Robin Williams quote, and your picture with Romeo ! I can completely understand your feeling. I am also super introvert, but I seek for connection with people. I know probably that is not exactly what you meant, but I hope I can be friend of yours, Beth!
I am always happy for new friends! That is one thing I love about the blogging universe, you can meet so many wonderful people without having to be in big crowds 🙂 Thank you so much for the support and friendship! 🙂
Yey! Nice to meet you, Beth! I am HiRO! I just recently started blog actively, so still I am figuring out what to do haha I am looking forward to talking to you as a friend 🙂
Very nice to meet you HiRO 🙂 You will be a blogging pro in no time, I’m sure! It is just a matter of playing with it until it looks the way you want it to. You are obviously a quick learner, though, because your site looks great already! 😊
I don’t know how I missed this post Beth, but I LOVE IT! And I love that you ticked off all of your wants with your new beaut! Perhaps I need to take a page from your book and do my own…something to think about! I am so thrilled that you are happy! You finding love is inspirational to me! xoxo
It is so funny how life works sometimes, isn’t it? 😄 Just 10 days after this, I went on my first date with Ted. ❤😉❤ I am a huge fan of writing it down and making it happen! I say, “Go for it, Janie!”