Forgiveness – The word is much simpler than the action.

I think the first step is to understand that forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator.  Forgiveness liberates the victim.  It’s a gift you give yourself. ~ T.D. Jakes


A beautiful bridge in the rainforest of Puerto Rico

I struggle with forgiveness sometimes.  We have all acted in ways that hurt another person.  When we do, a simple “I’m sorry.” can go a long way.  I truly believe that we should treat other people the way we would like to be treated.  I try to live my life by that standard and when I fail, which is more often than I would like, I apologize for my words or actions that hurt the other person.  Admitting that I have made a mistake is not always easy, but I believe it starts the healing process and can eventually bring me to reconciliation with the one(s) I have wronged.

What happens, though, when we don’t have the satisfaction of receiving an apology from someone who has wronged us or hurt us deeply?  Does this mean that because forgiveness was not asked for, it should not be given?

Most of us need time to work through pain and loss.  We can find all manner of reasons for postponing forgiveness.  One of these reasons is waiting for the wrongdoers to repent before we forgive them.  Yet such a delay causes us to forfeit the peace and happiness that could be ours.- James E. Faust


Lovely steps in the rainforest of Puerto Rico

I think Faust said it perfectly in the above quote.  Perhaps the individual that sees no wrong in his actions or words never will comprehend the extent of the hurt he has caused, but by holding on to that hurt and pain, we hurt only ourselves and not the other person.   Of course, forgiving does not mean we must subject ourselves to additional pain.  There is no value in setting ourselves up for misery by remaining in situations that drain us or around people who tear us down.

By that albeit difficult step of letting go of grievances and forgiving, we make progress toward our goal of being the best person we can be.

About Beth W.

I try to look for the positive in the people and situations I come in contact with! I believe in the power of positive thinking and I believe that even challenging circumstances can be learning experiences if we have a positive mindset! I'm having fun blogging at:
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2 Responses to Forgiveness – The word is much simpler than the action.

  1. kagould17 says:

    Forgiving someone who does not understand the hurt is the best form of revenge. In that single step, you heal yourself and let it go. By revenge, I do not mean we should seek revenge against those who have wronged us, but the forgiven person will at least be perplexed. I read a bumper sticker once “Revenge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die”. Have a great weekend Beth. Allan

    • Beth W. says:

      I totally agree Allan! I have heard the analogy of revenge to poison before. Great thought! I know it is something I still need to work on, but I am always improving! 😊 Thanks for your insightful comment! I always appreciate them! I hope your weekend is wonderful too!

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